United Scare

United Scare: A six hour flight

Last November, we were graced with the opportunity to fly to Miami to visit our long lost family. 

Therefore, we were subject to enduring a six hour flight across the country.  Here is the account:

Eating is difficult on an airplane. Packing a bag of food for two grownups and two small children that will last for a twelve hour day takes some great skill. Especially since most of the food that is convenient for toddlers will signal to the authorities that you might be a very unsavory character,and you will be subject to stern looking people scrutinizing your applesauce or yogurt and you might miss your flight, which does not offer any food items that are either edible or affordable to the common person. 

However, en route, its always a blessing to see that cart come down the aisle, even if the only options are syrup drinks or coffee. It is really nice to be able to sit for a good thirty minutes (because for some reason we are ALWAYS in the back of the plane) and daydream about weather you will get cranberry juice or stale coffee. 

Apparently, flight attendants can enjoy distributing drinks to alleviate boredom. Just about every time I looked up for six straight hours, I saw that cart coming down the aisle once again.  

Consequentially, every thirty minutes the entire airplane got up to use the lavatory at once. Being at the back of the plane made this scenario very interesting.  

Like clockwork, every thirty minutes the ladies would come down the aisle and offer us more drinks, then thirty minutes later the entire population of the airplane was waiting for the restroom. I got to witness two Jewish men waiting in line become friends. They pointed at their Jewish hats: "Oh, you are a Jew too?"  One of them said.  "Oh yes I am!" he responded with a smile on his face.

Instantaneous friendship. 

In the midst of the chaos of anxious people waiting uncomfortably and the joy of a new found friendship, I often find my mind wondering back to the life I once knew. My husband, my children. They were now lost behind a sea of strangers waiting for the restroom. Every once in a while I would see them from a distance and when an opportunity arose, I would reach my hand out across the way and take my husband's hand, so I knew my family still existed.

At one point, things calmed down, at least for a short while, in regards to people waiting for the potty, because the worst turbulence I ever experience began. The WARNING DO NOT GET UP signs came on. I gripped my seat, waiting to meet my maker. 

Somehow, however, the giant WARNINGS and the airplane earthquake did not stop the flight attendants from giving everyone more drinks. Here they came fumbling down the aisle once again with their soda pop and coffee. 

The passengers didn't take the warning seriously either.  I guess they drank too much.  Too much juice and water that is, and they could not sit down even for a warning sign because their bladders were too full.

To make things even more interesting, a flight attendant handed my three and five year old a very full glass of juice with NO lid on it.  I thanked her and asked her if she would like to manage my children while they dumped and enjoyed this treat. Okay so I didn't ask her that but I wanted to. 

Eventually the drinks ended, everyone went to their seats, and the flight descended.   

And I don't know what else to say.