'Til Death do us part

"I" is "Isaiah"
"M" is "Me"


I:  I am dying.
M: Oh, what is wrong?
I: My back hurts.
M:  Maybe you need a back massage.  I can do that, you'll be fine.
I:  No, this is MUCH more serious than a back pain, I can barley walk.
M:  Maybe you need to go to the urgent care.
I: Naw, I'll be fine if I just lay here on the floor for a few minutes.  OW!  OW!  OW!
M: Are you sure you don't want a back massage?
I:  The pain is deeper than that, it feels like a muscle, but it is inside.
M:  I think you have a kidney stone.  Let me look up the symptoms.......Okay you aren't acting like you are in labor you are not having a kidney stone.
I:  OW OW OW!!!!!!!!!!! AAAK AAAK AKK!  This is HORRIBLE!!!!!  help it REALLY hurts!!!!!!!!!!AAAH!!!
M:  Okay, maybe you are in labor.
I:That's ridiculous, I am sure it's just a pulled internal muscle I'm fine.
M:  Okay, well then, I'm gonna carry on about my day.  I'll be upstairs folding laundry.......
 I: (20 minutes later) Glued to a computer screen, hunching over and moaning:  "I think I've figured out what's wrong with me."
M:  Well, what is it?
I:  Well, it's Renal Cancer.
M:  Oh, well that will go away if you just lay down and take it easy for a few hours.
I:  Oh no, it hurts way way too much.  I can't lay down OW OW OW!!!!!!!
M:  Okay well then lets go to urgent care.  There's nothing else I can do for you.
I:  No, I am fine don't worry about it.  (He then gets up and goes upstairs to work).
M:  (30 minutes later, I go upstairs to check on him)  Uh, why are you laying on the floor in a fetal position?
I:  Well, I can't think of a better way to sit and think about who I am going to leave my belongings to when I die.
M:  Well, you don't need to think too hard about that, because all your things will belong to me.
I:  But.....you have to tell Jedidiah I love him.
M:  Okay I will do that.
I: And, that I hope he grows up happy.  OW OW OW!!!!!
M:  Have you tried Ibuprofen?
I:  No.
M:  Well how about it.
Isaiah took Ibuprofen for two days and was perfectly fine. 
Because this story happened over a year ago, I just turned to him and asked him how this got resolved.  He looked at me and said "Are you writing in your blog about all the times I was about to die and I didn't?"

The end.